161 - Arrow Chamber
Nick Proctor
The return to the holes in Arrow Chamber - this time with more rope, fortitude in our hearts and the hastily acquired knowledge of how to tie two ropes together. With Hugh looking forward with great delight to his first knot pass, we went down the hole to the 'ledge' we had reached previously, pausing only whilst I tried to rerig the deviation and dropped it down the pitch. Sigh ! Much faffing then ensued. Once we were both safely established on the ledge we did some bolting to create a fine freehang over yawning nothingness. ('Gibber' to quote Hugh - and I was going first !) Down I went - just before the knot pass became inevitable there was a ledge - very convenient. The bottom of this pitch 'Pointless' was reached 8m below this ledge. Then we found a scrofulous little crawl leading to another chamber. 'Lets shift some boulders' said Hugh. So he did, opening the passage by, ooh, all of half a foot. "We can get through now". Faff, faff, take off SRT gear, grunt, rant, faff, thrutch, swear, curse, apple strudel, and we're through. Shit - another pitch to rig. Tap, tap, tap for 25 minutes until bored, rig another bastard rebelay, go down to bottom, which indeed it was. Hoorah ! So we surveyed and derigged our way out, taking oodles of rope. Prussiking with two tacklesacks is awful. Almost as crap as caving itself (satisfied, Anthony ?) More faffing whilst I derigged the traverse - Hugh waiting patiently whilst I swore at every piece of caving gear in sight. Eventually finished, dumped the tacklesacks at Dewdrop (?) and came slowly out. A good trip. The two pitches have been finished, I didn't die and it wasn't epic. It was also my last caving trip. Hooray ! Oh Joy ! Oh Rapture ! Now I can go home and do something else other than caving. Unfortunately Hugh still has 1½ weeks to go. Ha Ha.
Right, ranting over, please take the book away from me, before I get too pissed (see back).
[Nick Pissed Illegible Ranting - from back of logbook. Ed.]
Once upon a time there was a caver. He was fucking hard. Nobody liked him. The Author of this tale got pissed. The caver fell down a pitch and died. The narrator of this tale was pissed and didn't give a toss. This may be given as evidence against me and I dont care. Caving is _SHIT_ especially with hard bastard _adam_ he is so hard. I want him. . But I'll have to make do with weegies and pissed novices. I care not and know not as long as they have powerful zooms - Ooh the things we get up to. Too much beer. Caving? What a shit idea! There are sceptics who think caving is good and a nice idea. Fuck off and die. Caving is shite, especially if you follow Adam down to 480m deep and then try to prussik out again. I'm a weegie and he's a hard bastard. Fuck off. I'm pissed and dont give a fuck.
For my sanity and yours, I shall stop now. If you are a caver, or have understood any of the above I would appreciate it if you would fuck off.
PS I hate caving
PPS I am very pissed
PPS I am extremely pissed
PPPS FUCK OFF
PPPPS Goodnight
PPPPPS Sad Bastard
AAARGH ! ! !
PPPPPS _Julian fuck off and die extremely horribly_
Hugh,
What boulder, I only kicked it a bit, honestly, as for as the tackle sacks' mine threw me off the pitch, rant. Nick was very brave, he only ranted most of the way down, and anyway I gave him lots of immoral support and carried two tackle sacks out. As for the squeeze I may never be the same again, something of me was left for prosperity. It was awfull (sp.)
* All relevant rant ends here [can't find the referent * on the photocopy, Ed., or in the book - other Ed.]
End of rant.
Or is it !! Lets hope so !
spelling 5/10
Look I'm an Engineer, OK !
Whats gramar anyway ? So am I, ignorant git
PS please make the cunning attempt to fill the logbook with complete bullshit ! (Sorry, this is what we should be doing anyway)
Where's my W.P. it can't spell either, hah ! I got to the end of the page, I win, I win, and no you are not going to write here.
Oh no you don't cos I can write small.
so can I hah !
[You can tell this is CAMBRIDGE UNIVERSITY caving club, can't you ? Ed.]